Skippy and Cortney Get Married and We Get Stuffed!

This year we had four weddings and three were conveniently located in Park Slope. The 2007 circuit came to a conclusion with the union of Skippy and Cortney at the aptly named Union Hall. Of course with these two in charge, there were delicious foodstuffs to be eaten.

I'm not exactly sure who catered the event, but I heard it might have been Ditmas Park's the Farm on Adderley, a restaurant high on, if not at the top of, my to-eat list. Guests were greeted with drinks and snacks seconds after entering. The bartenders churned out Pimm's Cups and Bloody Marys, the latter featuring lots of produce - celery stalks, cornichons and spicy pepperoncinis - which is how I like 'em. We also noshed on stuffed dates and crostinis with pulled pork and pickled onions before the ceremony began.

After quite possibly one of the best, if not the best wedding ceremony I've witnessed, the spread appeared! There were plates of cheeses and charcuterie and various salads, including a warm chickpea salad which may have featured some bleu cheese. Throughout the night, more plates appeared. Shell-on shrimp poached in a butter sauce! A sauteed dish of squid and potato! Yummy brussel sprouts!


And there was a taco fixin's corner. A big bowl of stewed beef was flanked by smaller bowls of finely diced red onion, cilantro, sour cream and flour tortillas.


Here's the plate I made glowing in the candlelight. Of course I went up for seconds, especially since new dishes were being rotated in.


Then it was time for desserts - mini key lime pies and delicious cupcakes. Dan and I split one of each, but then later in the evening I had another cupcake all by myself.


Congrats Skippy and the People's Cortney!!! I hope you're eating lots of plate lunches, SPAM musubi and poke in Hawaii!

Another Jewrean Wedding!

I've been delinquent in posting about the eatings at the wedding of Glen and Jane. Sadly (or should I say, typically) there are no photos of the food to share.

The ceremony took place in the Japanese Gardens at the Brooklyn Botanic Garden. Guests were served champagne on arrival. The bathrooms were a bit of a walk away so I hesitated a bit before finally deciding to have a drink. This has nothing to do with food, but Jane's little niece was possibly the cutest flower girl ever. She was so focused on strewing the petals evenly, that she got a little off-track and wound up going a few feet down the wrong path. It was adorable.

The reception took place at the Palm House. As the sun went down, we snacked outside on passed hors d’oeuvres and nibbles from a bountiful table filled with crudite, breads and cheeses. The passed snacks were top notch and included crab and apple salad served in crunchy endive leaves (my favorite), two bite pieces of sesame chicken (DMR's favorite) and baby lamb chops. The dinner was held under the glasshouse, which is pretty stunning at night. We began with a lovely salad with blue cheese and candied nuts and then a wedge of baked polenta blanketed by a rich, portobello mushroom sauce. DMR and I both opted for beef as our main course - filet mignons in a mushroom sauce with potatoes and crisp vegetables. Dan put in a good effort with his steak. I should have passed on those final two endive munchies because I was completely stuffed before dinner even began! Dessert was a trio of sorbets (mango, coconut and lemon) served in a martini glass with a cookie cigar as well as a plate of bite-sized cookies and chocolate covered fruit.


The cake was topped with a cute little birdy couple that Jane had created.


Mazel Tov!

Circular things eaten at a wedding

Christy and Carl were married over the weekend and for the reception Nils made 200 cupcakes in chocolate, almond and ginger. I really wanted a ginger one, but I knew it would be tough as he only made 40 of them. I picked up a non-chocolate one thinking I had the elusive ginger in my midst, but it turned out to be almond. It was still delicious. DMR and I shared that and a chocolate one, which was also delicious.

Nils is no joker in the kitchen. He makes his own gravlax. Who does that?



As day turned into night, 10 pies from Joe's showed up! I don't know who ordered these but you're the best! A fresh mozzarella slice helped to soak up all the alcohol and allowed me to keep on truckin'. Then DMR and I shared half of a buffalo hot wing slice that Blaine couldn't handle. In his defense, it was a lot hotter than expected, with no bleu cheese to provide a cooling effect. Then another food miracle happened.


SkipJackBonito appeared before our eyes carrying a bunch of these delightful treats and we scored one! I've seen these in the freezer case at Bierkraft and have always wanted to try one. Delicious creamy gelato from Il Laboratorio sandwiched between chewy discs of brownie. Yum. We shared ours with Christina and Charles. The rest of the night is a blur.

Jake and Lindsay’s Wedding: the final installment

A Brief Note on the Afterparty

I was just going to post some pictures, but none of the ones I had seemed really fit for mass consumption… Most of them featured generally responsible and productive humans, who will remain nameless and faceless, chugging Smirnoff straight from the bottle. So in addition to the aforementioned, the afterparty featured some amazing crazy dancing and a DIY hoagie bar. In honor of the bride’s native Pennsylvania, there were also a lot of Utz potato chips and Tastykakes on hand. Many of which were beautifully displayed in the bathroom. I was seriously craving the crab variety of the Utz, but I couldn’t find any. The next morning I was shocked and appalled to find an open, barely eaten bag of them. What a waste! I bet the person who did it also hated the caper berries at dinner…

Last Dinner on the Island

Most of the wedding guests left the day after the wedding, but Rabbi Paul, Sus and I stayed on the island for a couple more days of rest and relaxation. On the last night we went over to the Lief’s to cook dinner together. Earlier that day, RP, S and I picked mussels on the beach (can you believe that?) and bought some lobsters on the dock. Matt, who is a self-professed lobster anti-traditionalist gave us a brief consultation and decided that he should cook our lobsters with some rice and super tasty lobster stock another Matt had prepared a few days earlier. Since I am a lobster traditionalist, I was sort of looking forward to just eating them steamed and with drawn butter, but Matt’s lobster stylings were definitely delicious. I can’t deny it. We also ate the mussels foraged with our very own hands (cooked in butter and beer), salad (I think there was asparagus in it, which was a really nice touch one does not often see) and STEAK. The steak was delicious. It was procured from a butcher shop in Boston named Kenealy’s, Keneely’s, Kinelly’s or Kennelly’s. Believe it or not, this place is not at all googleable! I tried googleing it several different ways and NO DICE! Anyway, here’s some photographic evidence:

Unkosher Rabbi


Steak


Lobster


Cynthia baked 800 or 1,000 of these yummy ginger snappery cookies!


This picture is not of food we ate for dinner that night. But I think it is one of the loveliest pictures from THE WEEK and a nice way to say thanks and goodbye to the wedding.

Jake and Lindsay’s Wedding: Part III

The big day!

The ceremony was held outdoors at the Asticou Inn, overlooking the harbor. Again, I am definitely prone to hyperbole, but I really do think this may have been the most beautiful wedding ceremony I have ever attended. It was extremely intimate and personal, yet completely inclusive at the same time. You really could sense how loving and loved Jake and Lindsay felt. I really attribute that energy to the couple’s generous nature and overwhelming spirit of ubuntu. The idyllic setting didn’t hurt either.

I would also like to mention that Paul Newell performed the ceremony. As it turns out, Paul is not only a great friend, but he is a hell of a rabbi as well. In order to officiate and become eligible for powers being vested in him, he did one of those online thingies and is now a minister of the Universal Life Church! The card you get is really cool looking and I think I want to do it too. Anyway, he really could not have done a more amazing job. By the end of the ceremony, not only was everyone seriously schepping nachas, but they all wanted to convert to Paulieism (don't let me down Newell - I'm waiting for the pun) too! Here’s a picture of Rabbi Paul hugging the wedding couple in his tallis:


Here’s another pic of the happy couple and the rabbi:


OK, ready to talk about the food now. The first thing I noticed upon entering the cocktail hour tent was a huge table of raw oysters. This is precisely the sort of thing I am always hoping to run into. I think because I was having a hard time juggling my G&T and oysters, I ended up having only three. Usually I have anywhere from six to a dozen in a sitting. Then I noticed some people around me eating lamb chops, arguably the most coveted of all passed hors d'oeuvres (I have literally seen grown men sprint after unsuspecting servers carrying these succulent lollies), and I wanted in on the action. En route to lamb chop bliss I ate some delicious canapés (one was amazing tuna tartare with diced up avocado and the other was an incredible raw white tuna situation - very nice and buttery tasting). While eating the latter, I saw the lamb chops coming my way and wished I had a tail as both of my hands were otherwise engaged. Either Aaron or Matt gave me an assist and I finally got to experience the deliciousness that was the lamb chop. It was perfectly tender and had a nice hoisin glaze. To round out the roving hors d’oeuvre portion of the evening, I had some mini-crab cakes and some sort of savory meat pie. I think there is one more that I am forgetting. I really can’t remember WHAT it was, however I am certain it involved a balsamic reduction.

For dinner, we started with a salad of mostly frisee (this may not be true), possibly pignoli nuts and a wonderful, super soft, fresh mozzarella. Our second course was mussels (I’m always a big fan) and our third was a scrumptious lobster shepherd’s pie (the lobster tails rested atop a layer of spinach and mushrooms and were covered with tasty whipped potatoes). I’m sure there was dessert, but I didn’t see it because I was too busy admiring the dance stylings of this guy:



Next Installment: A brief note on the afterparty.

Jake and Lindsay’s Wedding: Part II

I call this the rehearsal dinner, but it may have just been dinner the night before the wedding. Regardless, it was probably my favorite of the many impressive meals affiliated with Jake and Lindsay’s wedding. It was hosted by the parents of the groom, Dan and Cynthia Lief, at their restaurant, the Islesford Dock. This is really a great place. The first time I ate there I remember remarking to the then chef, who is also my good friend, that the chowder was really noticeably much better than most or any I had ever had. He said it was because they do not use any potato starch. In a world full of mediocre chowders, I think about that often.

Upon arrival, my first order of business was to get a glass of Whooperman’s (sp?) rum punch (tasty, but slightly too acidic for me). En route to the bar I noticed some delicious looking ribs and got a little distracted. Not surprisingly, I decided to stop for one and I’m glad I did. To be honest, I am sort of prone to hyperbole, but truly, I think the ribs were the most succulent thing I ate all weekend. They were perfectly seasoned and cooked. Spicy, but not taste bud or lip numbingly so and crispy, yet so tender that they were FALLING off the bone. Dan actually told me about the preparation, but I do not feel comfortable divulging it here. However, in a more private setting, I do intend to try to duplicate it.

In addition to the amazing ribs, there was tons of lobster on hand. While the lobster was delicious, as it always is, that night its thunder was totally stolen by the r-i-b-s. Here’s a picture of me eating the first of roughly seventeen lobster tails:



I also ate a cup of clam chowder, which in addition to the usual suspects, included a healthy dose of BACON. And if you have ever met me, you know that I am a big proponent of adding bacon to nearly everything. While noshing on my chowder I noticed people eating some sort of baked clam situation. It took me a few laps around the restaurant before I finally found them, but I am extremely glad I put in the effort. I believe they turned out to be diced up quahogs and man, were they ever delicious! My sole regret is that I only got one, which, by the way, was entirely my own fault.

At that point, I decided to check things out on the dock, where they were grilling up some tasty smelling skewers. The first to come my way were of the shrimp variety. But one skewer was just not enough, so my fellow vultures and I went straight to the grill and ate a few more shrimp ones, along with some jerk chickeny ones.

Eventually, the eating turned into mostly drinking. I could not even begin to tell you how many Mount Gay and sodas I had. During speeches I snacked on a couple of lobster tails, which was amazing and totally appreciated by the way. Most times, when you’re feeling a bit peckish, you just grab a chip or something, but at this party, you could just grab a lobster tail, or nine! Thank you, Dan and Cynthia. You are geniuses and I am so glad you use your intellect for deliciousness and good instead of for evil.

After speeches and a beautiful musical item (let the record show, that despite having one of the most hauntingly gorgeous singing voices this side of the Mason-Dixon, your heroine WAS NOT asked to participate), everyone really let their hair down and the crazy dance portion of the evening got underway. Adam Levy did some of the best cabbage patching I’ve ever seen. And I have seen A LOT of cabbage patching in my day. Most of it incredibly good. Like any party worth its salt, soon people started dancing on the bar. Here’s a great picture of Jake and Lindsay in action:



So anyway, it was a great night. After the last drinks had been poured, a few of us went to a bonfire on Gilley Beach, which was all the way on the other side of the island. I have no idea how I made it. I fell in a bush and still have the scrapes and bruises to prove it.

Next Installment: The wedding!

Jake and Lindsay’s Wedding: Love and Gluttony Part I

Warning: This entry contains a lot of non-food related writing. Please don’t be angry.

The Thursday before Memorial Day I headed up to Islesford, Maine for Jake and Lindsay’s wedding. I was feeling pretty out of sorts that morning and frankly, was not feeling up to leaving NYC. But I had made a commitment, so I schlepped my gigantic bag to JFK to catch my 9:35A flight to Portland, Maine on Jet Blue (this, by the way, is an amazing deal – only 47 dollars each way), and let's just say I'm glad I did. Inside the Jet Blue terminal I milled about, looking for something to nosh on and ended up just getting a coffee from the Dunkin Donuts airport shack. Then I ran into Newell, Sus, Adam Perloff, Marni, Heather, Scott and the lovely Andersons. I noticed Marni eating some sort of bite-sized wrap situation, which reminded me that I was still in dire need of sustenance. Even the little wrap thingy looked good to me and as a general rule I avoid wraps like the plague. I would imagine my feelings for wraps are similar if not the same to the groom’s feelings about paninis. Regardless, I went to the place where M got her wrap and after walking around indecisively for what seemed like half an hour, though I’m sure it was really only four minutes or so, I emerged with a bag of spicy wasabi peas and some sort of gross Genoa salami and provolone pre-packaged antipasto. I blame a low blood sugar induced brain fever for the selection of the latter.

On board the plane, which was running half an hour behind schedule due to a mysterious last minute equipment change, the in-flight snacks were biscotti and Terra blue chips. I had the chips. So did Sus, though I think she may have spilled hers…

Once we deplaned in Portland, it was pretty much all downhill in terms of making the last ferry to the island, which was at 4:30P. Due to a series of, shall we say, unfortunate events, some of them in our control, some of them not, we ended up missing the boat. Literally, not figuratively. Newell, who was the rabbi for the nuptials, started to sort of freak out. After speaking to the groom on his cell, he started talking nonsensically about needing to be on the lookout for some tall scruffy man named Luke. This mystery man, a drifter if you will, would be on a blue and white boat with an outboard motor, and was our LAST CHANCE to make it onto the island! As it turned out, Luke was not just some random man of the sea, trolling about looking for inept New Yorkers to rescue and/or harass – he was the groom’s COUSIN! A rather relevant detail the good rabbi chose to omit, causing his panic to needlessly infect all those around him. Oh, and not only was this Luke character a cousin, but he was SO cousinny that there was actually a dinner being hosted at his house that very evening for all of the wedding guests. Jeeze Newell! Suffice it to say, I really don’t think he would have left us shivering on the dock in Northeast Harbor, turning on each other and wishing we had never been born.

After settling in on the island, we strolled over to the aforementioned dinner, which was incredibly delicious and set the tone for the rest of the weekend’s eating. Here’s what I ate:

♥3 – 5 slices of pretty rare, very tasty steak
♥2 crab cakes (On the second go-around I grabbed one for Sus, so it may have looked like I ate three, but I didn’t. Also, I chatted with Marci (sp?), aunt of the groom, mother of Luke, hostess and magnificent crab cake maker, about what made her crab cakes such a taste sensation. The answer: go easy on the filler and just use a lot of actual crab. Hmm…the best things are always so simple.)
♥1 tongful of salad
♥2 Geary’s Pale Ales

For dessert, I think I saw some blueberry cobbler and brownies. Both looked delicious, but as many of you already know, I do not eat dessert. This is not for reasons of health or fitness, so please do not hold it against me.

After dinner we headed over to the beach for a great bonfire / keg party situation. I believe the kegs were from a local brewery. Possibly Bar Harbor Real Ale, but honestly, I may just be making that up. In fact, I’m pretty sure I am. Regardless, it was very tasty. I also noticed a lot of people taking enormous swigs of Patron all around me. Like, seriously CHUGGING it. I watched one girl take a TWENTY-minute pull… Huh? Was it an optical illusion, or poor spatial/time perception on my part? I found it utterly confounding, but I was glad to see it nonetheless. Lots of joie de vivre on the beach that night and my surly mood from the morning had pretty much subsided. By the next installment it will be gone entirely.

Next Installment: Night before wedding dinner at the Islesford Dock Restaurant with our wonderful hosts Dan and Cynthia Lief, proud parents of the groom. I ate and drank so much I almost DIED.

Bart and Amy's Wedding

I'm very grateful to Bart and Amy for getting married on October 14 because otherwise I would have been home watching the Mets get spanked by Jeff Suppan. Instead I was enjoying ice cold Bud after ice cold Bud served in a wine glass. This might be my new favorite way to drink beer. The six or so ounces stay super cold while you drink it and there's no schwag to deal with.

Pre-ceremony, I had a lot of nibbles from the snack table, including crudite, babaganouj and cheese. The crudite included asparagus and radish, which was a nice touch you normally don't see. Normally, I'm not much of an eggplant fan, but I do enjoy a nice smokey babaganouj. Amie P. made combo bites with quartered figs and crumbly blue cheese on bread.

We didn't know much about the wedding eats, except someone heard from Bart that there be no chicken. That turned out to be true. Instead, we were served tender slices of roast pork and rare roast beef, the latter which came with a deliciously creamy horseradish sauce. Sides included green beans with crush almonds, a medley of roasted fall vegetables (beets, carrots, turnips, mushrooms), and roasted red potatoes. There was also a tasty penne in a cheesey sauce with zuchinni and sun-dried tomatoes. I placed a pat of butter on DMR's plate for his roll, only he ate it with a single bite, thinking it was cheese! I think JW Flood thought his butter pat was cheese, too. Silly boys. I got seconds and needed the rest of the night to fight it off. Thank goodness the Jackson Five was played, so I could get my dancing feet a-going.

I was too busy taking photos of the placecards to take a photo of my food. I think Amy has the nicest handwriting ever!!!


Well, here's a photo of the clean plate club. That's DMR listening to the game on his rinky dinky radio.

Nate and Heather's Wedding

Mazel tov! So anyway, today my partner in deliciousness emailed me to see if I was still alive. Her inquiry made me realize that I should probably make a post as I haven't done so since Fridayish. It's just that I've been recuperating from the wedding this whole time. Yep, it was a doozey.

The wedding was this last Saturday at the Tennis House in Prospect Park. The ceremony itself started at 7:00p, but there were hors d'oeuvres, cocktails and lawn games starting at 4:00p. Already I smelled trouble. I started off with a Stella, but then noticed that the bartender was making caipirinhas. Full blown trouble. So, while sipping down the evil temptresses that were the caipirinhas, I scarfed down lots of yummy hors d'oeuvres, namely shrimp skewers, chicken and pineapple skewers and some delicious little roast beef finger sandwiches. There were two other types of finger sandwiches, but I ignored them due to their lack of meat. I think one was cucumber (classic) and the other was some sort of roasted pepper spread. Not my cup of tea.

After the ceremony, which had an impromptu Queen Latifah show blaring in the background, dinner was served. While all of my friends were scrambling around looking for a large enough table to accommodate all of us, I decided to just help myself to some food. There was a nice selection of cold salady type things (pasta, potato, etc.), as well as barbecued chicken and grilled flank steak. I loaded my plate up with red bliss potato salad, haricots verts in a super nice blue cheese sauce, one chicken drumstick and as many pieces of flank steak as I could without being scowled at by fellow guests. All of my friends thought it was really just like me to saunter up to the table with a full plate of food, while they had been sitting at the table the entire time. Ha. Later, Ilan and Mike W. went back up to the buffet and returned with glorious heaping plates of chicken and beef, so we could all continue to gorge ourselves like some sort of weird carnivorous family.

After dinner, Papper and I played bocce against Zach and Antonia. Don't worry, we won, but it was really close. I made the winning shot! Then I danced a little to some surf music and watched Eli and Cooper play horseshoes. Just after midnight it was off to the Gate (on the way there, we happened upon a shopping cart, which I encouraged Ted to get in and then we pushed him the rest of the way), then to Zach's after last call. Around 5:00a I met a weird wedding guest and hung out with him until around 3:00p the next afternoon at Nate and Heather's. He was just so weird - I think I might love him.

So anyway, the next day (or later the same really long day if you're me) Nate had people over for a post-wedding bbq. There was steak, sausages, the most pork I had ever seen (v. nicely prepared by Ted) and some new potatoes. Oh, and corn. And lots of leftover Stella, Red Stripe and some amazing Hendrick's gin.

Suffice it to say, I am totally exhausted from the weekend's events.

Another Misc. Memorial Day Weekend Eating Pt. 3B

Part 3B mostly takes place in a huge white tent, the site of Dan and Jessie's wedding. After the ceremony, we gathered in the tent and the first thing I spied were plates of crab rolls. Were we supposed to help ourselves? I wasn't sure so I stayed put. Then servers started walking around with plates of snacks. The funny thing about these servers were that they were like 8 years old and I know I scared them. I wasn't trying to be greedy mean adult, but they kept looping around without coming near our table so finally, I had to do the hand wave to get their attention and there was one little server girl I know I totally spooked out. The two hor d'oeuvres I enjoyed the most were the mini sliced steaks on polenta with horseradish cream and mushroom and asparagus wrapped in phyllo. Yum, I'm getting hungry just thinking out them. At this point I watched some other guests make their way to the various food stations so I ran up and grabbed some crab rolls for the table. We were then told that there were homemade ice cream sandwiches and these were the proper first course (whooda thunk?). I went for the vanilla ice cream between two brownie squares. DMR opted for chocolate ice cream sandwiched between chocolate chip cookies. There was also an option with ginger ice cream. That may have been paired up with an oatmeal cookie.

I would wind up eating another crab roll before the day was over (and to tell you the truth, I probably could have had another couple). The rest of the food was an interesting mix of vegetarian and carnivore friendly fare. There were some Asiany snacks like vegetable maki rolls, veggie tofu skewers and inari stuffed with wakame salad. There was local fare like smoked trout, moose (just kidding!) and the crab rolls as well as overall crowd pleasers - like the chocolate fountain, into which you could dip fresh strawberries and profiteroles. As far as I know none of the kids stuck their finger into the fountain!

The beer selections were quite unusual. I saw a keg sitting around, but I never sampled its contents, because I was too busy trying two new-to-me beers: Black Sheep Ale and St. Peter's English Ale. The latter came in a gorgeous chartreuse flask bottle with a cute little crow on the label. Its unusual shape and color seemed more akin to a medicine bottle. One day I'd love to try their lemon and ginger beer. That sounds tasty.



The beautiful wedding cake was the last thing I'd eat - a delicious and moist carrot cake (with no raisins, hooray!) with cream cheese frosting. I took a small slice, but I wish I had taken a bigger one!

And somehow I managed to keep it all down

I did way too much eating this weekend, particularly on Saturday when I was faced with the predicament of a birthday lunch for my mom at Peter Luger's and then a Schnack-catered wedding in the evening. It was the first time at Peter Luger's for both Dan and I so while we didn't want to stuff our faces to the point of food coma, we did want to take advantage of a delicious lunch opportunity. We were both sated and under control until dessert, when Dan became a chocolate fiend.

To begin with, we had their world famous off-menu bacon: half inch slabs of pork belly glistening with fat and crusted with char.

How does that affect the Bacon-O-Meter? Clearly, it was one piece, but the equivalent of at least 4-5 strips. It was superb, although I probably wouldn't have minded a couple extra seconds in the broiler for my piece. The edges were cooked to my liking, but some of the streaks of fat in the middle were a little undercooked. My mother cut little pieces of bacon and slices of onion roll to make mini bacon sarnis for herself and little Ashlyn. I'm glad to see my little niece is already enjoying porcine perfection, but where was mine, Linda? We also shared a couple orders of shrimp cocktail, making sure to add extra horseradish to the cocktail sauce we were dipping the plumpers into. Two orders of "steak for two" were shared amongst the 6 adults and 2 little ones. For sides we got creamed spinach, German potatos (hash browns) and french fries. I think the little Buddha mostly ate cheerios and a cherry tomato. Maybe a piece of muffin as well. Ashlyn was content with french fries and some creamed spinach. She knew what awaited her - dessert! She also told me that not only was she the peanut, but that the little Buddha was the peanut as well!

While I immensely enjoyed the steak, the sides were really the stars of the meal for me. The steak didn't really knock me off my feet like I was expecting it to. The creamed spinach was so tasty and so rich. I had to eat tiny little bites as to not overwhem myself. I don't know what the french fries were fried in, but it made for an unbelieveably perfect fry - crisp on the outside, warm and soft on the inside. Dan took a liking to the super crispy ones that crunched like potato chips.

For dessert, we had a Holy Cow hot fudge sundae with birthday candle. Chocolate coins were tossed onto the table and the birthday song was sung. I abstained from dessert, save for a few bites of chocolate and whipped cream (or I guess schlag they might call it here). I had a roast pig to save room for!

So about two and a half hours later, I was nibbling on some pate (I thought it was smoked pork of some sort) and goat cheese and downing a Pacifico prior at the wedding of Alex and Anne. The consuming really didn't let up for another 5 or 6 hours. The pre-ceremony snacks consisted of the aforementioned slab of pate and plate of assorted cheeses with crackers. There was also a big bowl of shrimp cocktail but I skipped, having already eaten 2 pieces of shrimp with lunch. Trays of mini-schnack burgers and potato-codcakes were passed around, but I didn't get Schnacktified until post-ceremony, when I got Schancktified twice! I also got to try the elusive fries with pork gravy. The gravy was a little cold but I really didn't care because it was so savory and magical. This was my second time at a Schnack-catered event and what I want to know is where these fries with pork gravy were at the first one!

At this point, I had had a couple Pacificos and a margarita - recipe for disaster! During dinner, I switched to club soda and I think that was one of the smartest things I've ever done, because it really saved me from visiting Ralph. Dinner was served buffet style, with the following presented:

• macaroni and cheese
• french fries with more pork gravy (this time all warm and silky from the chafing dish)
• poached salmon with chipotle sauce
• garlic greens (this was probably my favorite side, aside from pork gravy)
• asparagus spears
• bbq chicken (this was my favorite protein)
• roast pork
• salad
• spicy cole slaw (yowza, you ain't kidding!)
• parker house rolls

Am I missing anything? After dinner, shots of Makers appeared (thanks Erik and Dani!), glasses of beer milkshakes, the vanilla ones of which were transformed into boilermaker shakes (thanks Hot Tub!). How in the world did I make it through the night? Also served for dessert were sundaes (make your own, from which I abstained) and wedding cake, which was super fantastico. It was chocolate with what I think was mocha frosting. There were pieces of crushed peppermint patties either in the cake batter or the chocolate ganache between layers.

Ok, you made it down this far so you deserve the truth. On the way to Commonwealth after the wedding, we were stopped at at a red light right at our corner. I couldn't let this opportunity pass me up as I was fading, so I hopped out of the cab and hobbled to our door. When I was brushing my teeth and tongue, I gagged a little and a tiny bit of creamed spinach was freed. It was not from drinking at all though, but I wanted to come clean.